Dr. David Orman

How to Release Guilt

By October 29, 2018 No Comments

Is there a person alive who has not experience guilt in one form or another within their lifetime? If so, please let me know who they are as they will be authoring the next blog post.

In the event you do not find one, there is relief coming. First, a few things.

Guilt is one of those emotions that has little to no value. Sure, it helps “remind” us that certain actions like killing or stealing or abusing your spouse, drugs or the dog are completely unacceptable, but seriously, we already knew that. Even those that engage(d) in said behavior(s) knew it but decided to do it anyway. They did not need guilt to remind them. They needed a compassionate, strong voice to remind them that they matter. So does the other person.

Other than these and other obvious ones, what is the point of guilt?

Take a few minutes. I’ll wait.

And the answer is. . . . . . ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Exactly. There is none. There is this notion that if we are less than ideal, anything other than perfect, we are then “required” to engage in some self-punitive behavior. If we do this long enough (who knows how long enough is), then we can probably be “forgiven.” Assuming we are perfect from here on out of course.

As you can see, it is an impossible task. Completely and utterly impossible.

We do our best and sometimes, magic happens. We do our best and sometimes we fail miserably. We sometimes do not always do our best and maybe we can learn from this. Guilt and punitive actions/words are not the vehicles to teach. Just the opposite. They lessen our will and sap our energy, often leading to the same self-destructive behavior that initiated the guilt to begin with.

Then What Do I Do

Make a commitment to practicing forgiveness, making amends when needed and being kind to self and others. Then change behaviors.  Make it a lifelong practice, knowing full well that “failure” will, in fact, visit on more than one occasion.

Now, find a quiet spot. Everyone tells you this prior to a special exercise because silence in the outer world brings silence to the inner world.

Once you have your spot, put your right palm directly under the right chest/breast area. It should feel like half the hand is feeling your ribs and half the hand is below then.

Rub across to the other side (chest/breast area). Depending upon the size of the person, it will be around 12 inches or so. Make the movement linear.

Start slowly and increase the speed of moving back and forth from the right side where you started to the left side/chest/breast area. By doing so, you should begin to feel a sense of a line of heat in the middle of the torse.

Do this for 3-5 minutes. Vary the speed and remember to focus on your breathing.

Doing this is a 2-fold benefit:

  • The Liver is like a “trouble-maker.” Its energy is often abrasive and confrontational. The Spleen, on the other hand, is the “peacemaker.” By rubbing and thus connecting the liver and the spleen chi (energy), the balance is restored. The liver gets subdued and the spleen is energized. The end result is a sense of deep peace and comfort.
  • Guilt arises from the liver and when the energy becomes balances, Guilt leaves and its energy is transformed into something more useful, often creativity.

It is about a simple method as you can get but one that has surprisingly quick and deep effects. Typical results include a sense that “I can finally breathe deeply now” or a release of soreness and/or stiffness in the solar plexus.

Mostly, it is the freedom from guilt and the joy of experiencing our most natural state – love.

David Orman

David Orman

David Orman is the founder and instructor of Central FL Systema school and is the first Certified Systema Instructor in Central Florida, receiving his Full Certification from Vladimir Vasiliev. David started martial arts training in 1985 and has black belts in Aikido, Karate and Kumdo. He is 1 of only 4 Americans certified in The Approach. David also has the title of Sifu in Tai Chi. David currently trains in Systema with David and Rick Merrell regularly, and Vladimir Vasiliev and other Systema Masters when possible.